We’re lost in the carpark. Here’s why men never ask for directions. One map, 6 guys, 8 opinions. But Mr McCartney knows a secret.

Ride up the Champs Elysees on the final stage of Le Tour and you get champagne. We load up with Heinekin.

The final stage start. From the mountains of West Virginia to the beaches of Florida.

Could we be more obvious? The money shot – Neil flashes some thigh.

We set off from FUMC Orlando early in the morning in the direction of Melbourne to ride on a spit of land just off the coast of Florida. It’s a long straight road, the A1A so what a delight to pull up at the beqach carpark and find the flags blowing in a tailwind.

We belted down the road in a tight paceline averaging neqarly 22mph for the first 18 miles. The journey was unremarkable really until we stopped in Vero Beach for lunch, inviting the now regular storm to make its appearance. We sat 2 hours in a beach side restaurant, eating, drinking, synchronising photos until the storm blew over. Then we hit the road again, not wanting to finish the whole trip this way.

We rode another 12 miles or so finishing in Fort Pierce when time beat us – we had an appointment in Port St Lucie at 5pm.

Showered and changed we joined an big gathering of FUMC PSL people for a barbecue and plenty of craic. The the unenviable task of clearing out the vehicles.

"What do you do with this thing again? Am I mistaken or was there another part?"

Bye!

Yet another early start. Breakfast at 6am to be on the road by 7am. We drove west of Orlando to a rail bed that has been converted into a 46 mile paved bike trail, beginning in Citrus Springs and ending just south of Ridge Manor.

It was hot again and storms were threatening but we set off at blistering pace again. The trail was about 12 ft wide and perfectly flat and we beetled along through small town Florida, mostly forgotten or unknown by the legions of tourists and retirees who flock to the state.

We stopped at an Irish pub for lunch. ‘nuf said.

Wildlife spotted included VERY large turtles, blue herons, snakes and various unknown things which may just fancy you for lunch.

Jools had a flat and only 1 rider had the courtesy to stop. We changed the tube quickly as a storm announced its impending arrival with repeated outbursts of lightning and thunder. When ready we raced the storm in an effort to stay ahead of it. We covered 14 miles in around 45 mins – the last 5 miles in just over 12 mins. Great fun.

We reached Ridge Manor where the drivers waited to supply us with food and water only to be overtaken by heavy rain and thunder forcing us off the road after 41 miles.

It stayed like that all the way to Orlando.

Jools kneels to pray…or to throw up again, we’re not sure.

Neil’s looking for something.

Sense a theme emerging? Know what it is yet? It’s REVENGE.

So what did they do while we slowly baked?

Does Tim look happy or what?

Roasted on the road.

Alan auditioning for the wet t-shirt  competition.

The drive to Jacksonville was very long. Some of us rose early in Atlanta and had the most stunning breakfast at Joe’s house where the banter round the table was distinctly Irish in tone. Following an appearance at Glenn Memorial UMC adult Sunday School and a farewell to Beth, we hit the road and got to Florida at about 7.45pm.

We promptly left for our host’s homes before reassembling at 7am the next morning. VERY early.

But we needed to be on the road early to beat the heat. Atlanta, the previous Saturday for the Silk Sheets Route had had its hottest day of the year so far. So imagine our delight to hear that Jacksonville was anticipating their hottest for Monday. And it was hot – mid-90s apparently. The route was terrific, very flat and safe. We formed a paceline and averaged close to 20 mph for most of the way round.

But it got sooo hot. Everytime we stopped to take on water which was frequently, the sweat just poured out  of us. The sun hit us like a hammer.

We quit the road about 1230, having ridden hard for about 3.5 hours. By that stage the road is heating up as well so you get radiant heat from below and the sun from above.

Great ride…but hot.

Later that afternoon we found some space to get away from one another. Some went to the beach. Some drank coffee and read for a while. It was much needed solitude of a sort.

Thanks to Rick Neal and the good people of Beach UMC who hosted a dinner for us in the evening.

We’ve been a little short of time and wireless in Florida so I’m behind on the reports. They’ll come -  Orlando airport and Gatwick have wireless and we’ll have time, so I’ll catch up then. But here is the sea-level equivalent of the photo on top of Mt Mitchell. This was taken at the start of the last stage From Melbourne into Port St Lucie.

find them here.